I took an Ambien a little while after getting home from Tallahassee Community Chorus rehearsal last night and went to bed quite early! It must've been around nine or ten. So now I am awake early. I had a feeling this might happen and it is okay. I would rather be awake after having a good night's sleep than stay up too late while feeling tired.
In chorus we are singing exclusively Beethoven-composed songs in preparation for our April 11 concert. I will let you in on a little secret...I don't really dig the songs very much...at least not yet. Every single one of them is in either Latin or German and the melodies are not sticking with me. There are one or two that I am finding pretty or interesting sounding, the rest are kind of getting on my nerves. Maybe they will grow on me.
Today in my FSU e-mail we received an invitation to a concert that will be honoring the memory of a woman who taught (and did a whole lot of other impressive things!) there and passed away earlier this month, Beth Newdome. I looked her up, to read about her life, and she appears to have led a very inspiring, full life. Not in length of years, but in things she did. I read that she fought cancer for five years. I wonder what kind of cancer she had. You can read about her life here: http://rocohouston.blogspot.com/2010/02/rest-in-peace-beth-newdome.html .
More about me...ha ha. My moods have been pretty stable...actually, I dare say I've been pretty happy for what feels like a while now. Perhaps it has been a week? Well I started crying a little bit tonight during Chorale practice, but I was feeling pretty tired. Plus I think reading about Beth Newdome might have struck a chord (or hit a nerve). Yes it is inspiring, but of course it makes me feel a little sad too. And of course when I got in the car after Choir, one of the first songs I heard on the radio was about the "good dying young." So I had a good little cry.
I don't plan on dying anytime soon. And I think about having had cancer less and less these days. But it is still a part of my life. It is a real thing that has happened. I have a row of doctor appointments coming up during my spring break (week of March 8). Still got my port. Still got a residual mass. Still taking Prednisone (though I am done to 20 mg!) Feeling pretty good, physically, aside from occasional achiness in the area where the mass is. I have the very very very occasional night sweat. Which are minimal, so much so, compared to what I experienced before diagnosis. The last night sweat I had was also confined to just one location, my chest. Which also makes it distinct from the pre-diagnosis night sweats. People sweat! Healthy people sweat. I try not to give it too much thought. It is what it is. "I Yam what I Yam." (I had a friend who wore a shirt sometimes with a picture of Popeye on it and that statement! At least I'm pretty sure that is what it said. Does that make sense?) I'm rambling.
Enough of that. On to brighter subjects. I am learning so much in school. It is getting the point where I am beginning to see intersections between the different classes I am in, and helpful connections are being made. I am already becoming a better musician, I can tell. It makes all the difference in the world, in my case, to have an instructor. I didn't know what to do to improve as a musician before, although I knew there is always always always room for improvement. Now I am receiving instruction in three different instruments (piano, guitar, and voice) at once, and improving in all of them!
I am also learning techniques for using music with people of all ages. It is called being a "group leader." This class (Music Recreation Techniques) is forcing me to see how I look in front of a group of people (literally, the labs are filmed) and improve my communication/leadership/social skills. Music Rec. Tech. is also building my repertoire! Our midterm involved handing in a notebook with twenty songs for different age groups that we could play on the spot. I selected mostly new material.
Music Theory is opening my eyes to how the Western tradition of music has thought about how music actually works. What it looks like on paper, patterns in the relationships between notes, what makes a melody memorable, how different kinds of chords are built, major and minor key signatures, how to write counterpoint--all kinds of things! And in World Music Cultures...I love this class....learning about music in different parts of the world! So far we have learned about Tuvan Throat/Overtone Singing, Balinese Gamelan, and now we are studying Hindustani Raga. It is very very interesting.
So, if any of you were wondering what I have been up to over here in Tallahassee, there is a little summary for you!
To put it simply, I am feeling creatively, intellectually, and spiritually stimulated. I am in a great environment for the musican AND academic in me. Excited, I am, about the tools I am being given. A lot of good is going to come out of this, I can feel it. And it already is, it already is.
Peace, People.
